Go to the mountains

Go to the mountains
if you are lonely,
or waiting;
their crude wisdom of heights
is stark
and final.

They will show
that loneliness
is merely
hope
beset by impossible
distance,
and that to linger
in high altitude
is certain death.

Something Alien

Something alien
has settled into this heart
of failures.

It says things like
"You're better now"
and
"Risk it all"

And I don't know
whether to call it a bastard
or thank it
for saving my life.

The Corridor

One day

I came upon another

who dwelt in the doorways

of this corridor.

I watched her peer into rooms

as I do,
front-lit, feeling their slow gravity,

their snare of comfort,

before retreating to the lonely freedom

of in-between.

Perhaps

we could walk awhile

together

until we find what we can’t resist.

This Feeling is Like Waking

This feeling is like
waking
warm in bed
after the crumbling
logic of a dream;
a smile of sudden
knowledge
that there is someone next to me
if I were to just
reach.

It's opening a book to the
middle
inhaling
with pressed nose
great draughts of unread
pages
which might say
anything.

Phantom Limb

You're everywhere around me
in the things I don't do anymore.
You are ever-presently
gone.

I attend this phantom limb
with a brusque vigilance.
How else do I tell something
it isn't real
again
and again
yet still know it's
a part of me?

This Deep Breath

I'm good, I promise.
I'm ready to feel,
just please don't touch me.
I'm enjoying this moment
free of tumult;
this moment that's still just me.

This deep breath
can't last forever, I know;
I know I'll be back
in the work of life,
that this distance I hold
won't last,
and shouldn't.

It's as hard to hold onto
as you'll be.
But at least I know who I am.

I can recall my past lives
as I would tongue a sore gum,
or peel a scab.
I know my own pain,
and I know it isn't fatal.

I'm not ready for yours.